Formal Night - Vacation Story Part 2

Its time to continue with part deux of the Fashion, Fishing & Freedom's vacation blog.  A week is much too long to wait.  I don't know how any of you got anything done this past week in anticipation of this post. Luke did an excellent job in his previous post describing some vacation fashion tips.  

To recap, Luke and I (and our wives...no seriously) took a trip to Orlando, which included a cruise to the Bahamas from Port Canaveral (where they do that NASA space ship stuff).  Similar to Luke, my vacations growing up consisted of driving an hour north to Missoula and spending the night at the Sleep Inn, since they had a swimming pool.  Always a good time.

We decided to save a few bucks by taking a discount cruise line...don't worry, they had plenty of fresh fruit on board to stave off scurvy.  We got a great rate by agreeing to mop the poop deck.  We saved even more money by passing on the all-you-can-drink rum package (never buy the drink packages...two words: rough water).

The great people of Nassau were so excited for FFF's arrival to their nation, that they threw a parade for us!

After getting into a scuffle with some pirates (after we taught their parrots some inappropriate words), we opted for the less discount cruise line, which happened to have a formal night

I'd like to expound and/or elaborate (what, you didn't think I knew any fancy words?) on some fashion vacation tips by digging into the fashion of formal night. Formal night was created by the cruise lines to make themselves seem fancier without actually needing to spend extra money themselves to give the cruise that feel.  In fact, they make money off of people because you can choose to rent a suit on the ship for a hefty fee (don't be a sucker for that - borrow a suit).  As Luke somewhat alluded to in last week's post, formal night kind of stinks when you're flying to a location for a cruise, because you have to somehow pack a full suit in your suitcase.  It only makes matters worse when the suit jacket you bring is a hand-me--down from your 6'-3" father-in-law and it has some shoulder padding.  Hey, it beats actually paying for a suit!  I've lived in the South for 3 years now, which means I should have purchased a suit by now.  Somehow I've avoided that.

Only photographic evidence of me wearing the suit jacket (not pictured: bottom of the suit which reached my knees. Definitely pictured: hott wife)

 I at one time owned a sweet brown hand-me-down suit that I scored at goodwill for literally $3.  It lasted me through high school and college.  I loved that suit because no one wears brown suits anymore. Fashion tip: wearing something that no one else wears is cool...I think.  I guess just do it confidently and you'll be fine.  However, once my wife first saw me in that suit, it was time for it to go back to Goodwill for its third (at a minimum) chance at life.  

Just a normal picture of me heading to class in college in my brown suit.  I actually borrowed this particular suit jacket from my roommate Matt.  It was a hand-me-down of a hand-me-down.  The hipsters would go crazy for this look these days.

Bonus pic: What suits in the future will look like.  My kids and grand-kids will love to borrow this from me for their adventures (possible formal night on their Royal Galaxian space cruise to the moon?)

Once we got to dinner, I took the jacket off as to not look too goofy. My wife appreciates it when I don't embarrass her (I like to throw marriage tips into the blog now and then).  It was also a comfort decision, which is one of the main factors in fashion as this blog has repeatedly stated.  After dinner, our fashion co-editors asked for Luke and I to pose for a few pics.

Not going to lie, this was a little weird

Not going to lie, this was a little weirder

Not going to lie, this was the most awkward moment of my life

Just laugh it off and never speak of it again

Yes its true, even if the above pictures give you other ideas, Luke and I have very fashionable women in our lives

Stay tuned for Luke's post on theme park fashion in the not-so-distance future.  You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll wish you hadn't wasted so much of your life without proper fashion advice.  Until next time...

Nassau Fast - Vacation Story Part Uno

 During a vacation to Nashville in May of 2014 the fashion blog was born. As Hollee and Sarah discussed fashion blogs they liked to view to get ideas at what to wear, Me and Jon looked at each other in much confusion over this idea. Ordinary people write about what they wear? Other people take the time to read what ordinary people have to say about what they wear? People read and than copy other ordinary people on what they write about what they wear? This opened us up into a whole new world and we thought well we ain't never heard of no man ever writing about what to wear. Being that we pride ourselves on our appearance we created this blog to reach out to the world to help men look really really ridiculously good looking. So we introduced the blog to the world (our world really only consists of like 6.5 people, thanks mom for reading these posts and pretending they are good).

In January of 2016 we went on an adventure to Florida and the Bahamas to take a vacation with the Claxtons. When growing up a vacation meant we packed up our sleeping bags and tent and drove 20 miles to the other side of town and stayed in a tent all week. Stuffing 7 people in a tent in the 100 degree summers was always quite interesting especially when one of those people was Caleb. For those of you who know Cal he was always bouncing off the walls. Unfortunately when you try to bounce off a tent wall they just collapse. So after setting up the tent 8 or 9 times every night we'd finally get a few hours a sleep only to wake up and find a bear had eaten everything out of the cooler. True story our cooler had holes from bear teeth.

I promise I am going to get to fashion in a second just get through this next part it is important to establishing how I became the face of male fashion. So anyway the reason we took trips like this were partially because my parents were afraid to take Caleb out in public and partially due to funding. Apparently raising 5 kids ain't cheap. Ironically when I ask mom why she married dad, she always says because dad was going to be a millionaire by 30. My mom, bless her heart, was obviously blinded by love as right after they got married they moved to Montana and started making jewelry out of elk turds, another true story... I am sure you are surprised to hear that this was NOT a million dollar idea. My dad has tried a few other million dollar ideas but they did not pan out. He did however invent the selfie many years back. My brother Cole's long arms were the original selfie stick. Unfortunately he did not patent this or the Bentley's would be making millions off of the Kardashians alone. Not to mention every other duck faced girl in the world (don't think dad invented the duck face).

So that brings me to the Bahamas many years later on a vacation. We saved up a few Benjamin's and decided to take vacation with the Claxton's, we settled on a cruise to the Bahamas. A cruise ship  is essentially a city on water. There was over 3 times the amount of people on the ship than the town I grew up in. Camping in a tent with 7 people is sounding pretty nice now.

On an island with our ship in the background.

Luke: Free MSU T-shirt, Target Board Shorts, Grand Ole Opry Hat, Generic Flip Flops

Jon: Clearance Rack Shorts and Shirt, Miller Light Hat with Bottle Opener and Sandals

 You are probably tired of my rambling and dying to read something about vacation fashion... The number 1 rule we apply to fashion is comfort the 2nd rule is dress for the weather, took my dad many years to train me on this rule. Now Florida is known is the Sunshine state because it is sunny there. One thing you have to consider when traveling cross country is that you need to limit what you are packing to fit in your suitcase and on your person. I find it best to wear many layers on your person when taking a plane. It saves room in your suitcase and provides additional barriers from the inevitable somehow legal groping you will be subject to by a TSA agent. You voted for it...  On the cruise they consider casual to be slacks and a sport shirt. I should have backed out as soon as I saw that... Casual is Cargo Shorts and a tank top or t-shirt at best.  What kind of elitist considers a pant suit casual?   Anyway following my bride's wishes I followed their dress rules, although there is no photographic evidence of this but in our pursuit to becoming the world's voice for mail fashion we find it important to educate ourselves on various modeling techniques. We took the time on the ship to copy some great poses from the statues on board. Below are the shots from the shoot. It is very important to diversify your looks. We practice these poses in the mirror for hours sometimes days.

Pose Name: Peacock

Pose Name: Personal Protector 

Pose Name: Happy Boy

Pose Name:Bubbles

One night was formal night at least they didn't try to change the definition of formal so I was good to follow these rules. I think the best way to approach formal is just get a hand me down suit from your dad or grandpa as in 2016. The baby boomers and other past generations all own suits so they are a great source. Jon's follow up post will address formal night. Do remember though that Ghil-leaf suits don't count as a formal suit...

Also a follow up blog on Theme Park etiquette will follow for our 6 and a half readers enjoyment.

Oscar our waiter for the trip is the guy waving